Being thankful.....

I know that it's not November but sometimes I think that it's a good idea to take other times of the year to give thanks for the good things in our lives. I sometimes have the tendency to be a little more negative than I would like, so that is why in this little lull I have going on in my work I am want to think of most of the things that I am thankful for...I would say all but I don't think that I have the brain capacity for that at this point in time. *Sorry...being sick lately and being a new mommie...there is not too much room for anything else in my mind right now.

1. I am thankful that I have a wonderful husband...sometimes he disagrees with me on this one, but yesterday he reafirmed this for me. I had started not feeling well on Wednesday, but I was trying to fight it (silly me..) he was trying to make me go to bed early and fix me dinner and take more of the lead of caring for Kenzie but me being the stubborn and loving :) wife that I am didn't let him do all of these things (I guess I just felt like I would be a bad mommie if I wasn't the one taking care of everything around the house). SO I woke up at 4:30 Thursday morning feeling like death (strong term, sorry)...could barely talk, my ears and throat hurt and my head was pounding...there was no way I was going to be able to get up and be able to deal with middle schoolers...so I emailed out of work and told Clint that I couldn't do anything that day. He being as awesome as he is, got up, got everything together (with me sleepily talking to him from the bed), switched out the car seat, and got Kenzie ready for daycare and instead of making me get up to take her and nearly making himself late for work (only becuase this is the first time that he has been able to take her without me) took her to daycare so mommie could get a full day of rest and try and get to the doctor. Then he was awesome enough to check on me throughout the day and even when he got home and I was feeling better he still was doing most of the work. I love him...

2. My beautiful...so like me at times daughter. Kenzie is such an amazing addition to mine and my husband's life. She makes us laugh, she brings us closer together but most of all she amazes us each day. I love waking up and seeing her little face and knowing that she is a part of clinton and myself. But she really is like me which makes me smile....of course not in that moment but within a few minutes after...she can be sooooo impatient sometimes (and I know that her grandparents would beg to differ on this) and she get sooooo fussy if you don't get that bottle ready fast enough or if you aren't paying attention to her but it cracks me up because as soon as I look at her (or Clinton does) she starts laughing. Such a manipulator already shesh! Boy are Clinton and I going to have our hands full!

3. My wonderful parents and in-laws....I love them all sooooooo very much. My parents have always been soooooooo supportive (even if they didn't always fully agree with my decisions) and so loving.... and I truly can tell them anything without feeling scared and know that they will love me and understand where I am coming from. They will laugh with me (or at me sometimes), they will cry with me, and even though they don't always have it themselves, they are always willing to go above and beyond what they need to, to make sure that I am taken care of. My in-laws, whom I can call mom and dad too are great as well. They treat me like a daughter....I feel as though I can call on them day and night. And they are always willing to babysit (wonder why that is?) I love being with them on the weekends and it's soooo funny because there are times when Clinton will say-my parents love you more than they love me! But I am so thankful to have them here and to know that Kenzie is able to spend time with both sets of grandparents, and I pray that they continue to live long lives so that she will grow up with all of them.

Of course I can continue to go on and on....and tomorrow I will put up at least three more people/things...( and yes, Maria you will be on here, but I feel as though you deserve your own number so be patient)...that I am thankful for...so that whenever I am feeling down I can reflect on this and know that I am loved and I have people that need me!

Happy Friday to everyone...and continue to say prayers for baby Scarlett...she is doing well but her and her family still need our prayers and thoughts!!!!! *Praying for a miracle and going red for baby Scarlett!!!!

New Year...

Well 2011 is here and there's no turning back! Clinton and I made it through our first Christmas as a family...and we are exhausted! I think that we did pretty good with making the rounds to various family members while still enjoying some one-on-one time with our precious baby girl. Then the week after Christmas the road was our home, seeing various family members, some who had not even met her just yet! It was amusing to see her interact so wonderfully with new people.

New things that Kenzie is now doing:
1. She rolled over for the first time 12/18/10 (she now does this consistently but then gets mad when she's on her tummy)
2. She laughs out loud...sometimes she will just start laughing at anything! It's soooooo contagious!
3. We are currently working on trying to get her to crawl...but all she seems to be doing is face planting into the carpet...oh well!

So instead of doing resolutions Clinton and I went with goals.....I know it's basically the same thing but in my mind it sounds better. We have decided (with the help of looking at our finances with a professional) that our dream of getting a new house is going to be placed on the back burner for longer than we would like :(  Silly college education-making us broker by the day! So we are now looking at maybe getting a new(er) vehicle. All of our cars are 10-15 years old, and while for the most part they run rather well, they do have some mileage on them and we just need a little more space with the baby and whatever the future holds with new babies. So we will keep working on the savings and keep working on paying down the credit cards...which we hope by the end of summer we will be almost completely paid off (at least two out of the three). Sometimes I am so glad to be an adult (NOT!) but with a little patience...which I am getting better at, and cutting back on always wanting to grab breakfast on my way to work versus making it at home and not going to starbucks and remembering to pack my lunch and with Clinton doing the same we will hopefully see more money going into savings and the dream of getting a newer car and eventually getting a newer house and paying off our debts will become a reality-not in 2011, maybe not even in 2012, but soon...our last goal is to be somewhere new before Mackenzie starts school...so here's to hoping that 2015 is our dreams come true year!

when mommie is sick....

"I can't fight this feeling any longer...." well this feeling of being sick! hehehe sorry decided to give a little song clip in the beginning, and if you can tell me who sings those lyrics I will be a happy camper. So I have been sooo busy as of lately and now my body has decided to give me a swift kick in the behind and in the chest. I have feel as though I am going to cough my head off and poor my hubby...he's doing such a great job of taking care of two babies! Me being the stubborn woman that I am always give hima hard time, but he finally got me to go to bed at 7:45 last night. So while my body doesn't hurt as bad, my nose is like a facuet but so stuffed that I can't breathe and my chest hurts from all the coughing!

I can't believe that it's only a week and three days until CHRISTMAS!!!!! I am picking up my sister from the airport tomorrow and we are headed home to good ole PC the day after. This will be the first time that she is going to see her little niece so I am excited and I know that she is about to jump out of her skin. I still have so much to do this even before tomorrow...I just need like a ton of energy to get it all done. There is cleaning and laundry to be done, I still need to wrap a present or two but I feel so bad because we couldn't give everyone as much as I wanted to.

Money is tighter than I expected it to be and with my upcoming loan payments for school it looks like there is going to be a lot of ramen eating going on the in Roof house, which is fine-makes me think of college... oh how I miss the days of not having to pay any bills. But I guess that is what growing up is all about!

Well to everyone know that I love you and MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Reflection Time...

So today is my birthday...I am officially a quarter of a century old...ewwwww 25 sounds a lot better! But while I was getting ready this morning I was thinking about my life up to this point. There have definitely been some really, really, REALLY crappy times...but there have also been moments that I wouldn't trade for the world. I am one happy camper this morning when I think of all that is good in my life.

I have a fantastic marriage....sure we argue sometimes, but at the end of the day, I love my husband and there's nothing better than going to bed every night beside him, and waking up next to him...he really does understand me and all my moodiness, and loves me all the same.

I have my master's degree and was able to hold my head high and walk across that stage to recieve my diploma, even if I was 7 months pregnant. It came with a lot of tears and sleepless nights, but it was worth it.

I have a wonderful job...middle schoolers are a different creature from most human beings, but they make me smile and make me happy to be able to work with them every day. And I got the job just 5 weeks after giving birth, and going through 3 interviews and sending out at least a hundred resumes/cover letters.

Most of all, I have a BEAUTIFUL, WONDERFUL AND AMAZING baby girl....my little Kenzie, and I really didn't think that I could love anyone as much as I love her...now I love my husband, but this love for Kenzie is beyond words. Even after the toughest day, I can pick her up and everything is right with the world.

So to all my doubters...yes, even those family members who thought that I would never amount to anything after my divorce, TAKE A LOOK AT ME NOW!!!! I am a happily married, mother of an amzing daughter with a successful career in the counseling field and guess what...I AM HAPPY!!!!! So HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!

Where has the year gone...

I cannot believe that Thanksgiving is over and Christmas is only 26 days away. I apologize if I have put some of you into panic mode! Due to Kenzie's desire to share her formula with the rest of the world, we did not travel over the holiday, at least not to the original destination that was planned, we stayed a little closer to home just incase the worse case senerio occured. Luckily, nothing major happened except for two very huge loads of laundry made up entirely of Kenzie's clothing because it was all covered in spit-up.  *sigh* I opted not to call the pediatrician today mostly because I figure that the phone lines would be impossibly busy and I doubt that we could get an appointment today anyway, plus I have my post-op exam from my wisdom teeth being extracted. (Which I am feeling great from, haven't had to take any pain meds in two whole days! YAY!)

Thanksgiving itself was fabulous...and by that I mean that the food was great (what little bit I had), having Kenzie passed around and recieving lots of kisses, and hugs and new clothes and very special new elmo from her older cousin, truly made the day one to be THANKFUL for. Among other things, I am extremely thankful for my wonderful new family...Clinton is a marvelous hubby and daddy...and having a precious baby girl (even when she's fussy and throwing up everywhere) just makes me so happy to wake up every morning and know they are there! I just can't believe how fast she is growing!!!!

We, and by we I mean my mother-in-law and auntie Karen and myself took the baby to have her picture taken with Santa over the break. I wanted to get it done before the rush of Christmas and we were already heading towards the mall anyway to get some other things done, so why not just get it all done in one fell swoop! She did really well, I will post the picture later when I figure out how to get it on here, she didn't cry or spit up on Santa so I was VERY happy! We also took some time and went to Wal-mart and I picked up a couple of Christmas presents for her. I can't wait to get the tree up...maybe this weekend, but probably not, we have a jammed-packed weekend ahead of us and I just hope that Kenzie is up for the whirl-wind that is the Christmas season and trying to visit everyone. But at least all my Christmas shopping is done, minus one gift card and the two big gifts for Kenzie that we are waiting until I get paid to pick up. And then I can begin to wrap presents!!!! I actually enjoy wrapping presents, but I don't know how well it's going to go with the baby this year.

I guess I will end this post with a Christmas wish....for everyone to be happy and merry, to enjoy your family... always remembering to tell them that you love them and be thankful for them. Make lots of memories and remember to take time to enjoy this holiday season! Happy Monday everyone!

What to do...

I find myself exhausted this morning...like so tired I could fall out of my chair right now and just sleep on the cold tile floor for hours! This weekend was interesting to say the least but now I am at a crossroads. So on Friday I had my wisdom teeth removed, and I was THANKFUL that I had a wonderful husband who helped take care of a "winey" person-no I have to admit that I did complain a LOT becuase I am a very picky eater and most of what I eat I couldn't because of the surgery *sigh*. I got some rest on Friday and Kenzie was a good baby dealing with the shots from the day before, only she was still spiting up.

Saturday we headed over to my in-laws to spend the day with them and to do a little shopping. Her spitting up returned with a vengence! Although she wasn't too fussy so the Zantac is helping to ease her discomfort with the food coming back up. However, I am now concerned with the fact that more food seems to be coming up than before. And it comes up at several different times, she burps like she is suppose to but you leave her be for a bit and the next thing you know she's spitting back up nearly all that she ate. I know she's not in pain, because she's not screaming like she was before, BUT I would rather not have to do laundry every day because of her constantly throwing up and covering bibs and burps cloths and clothes with formula and food. I just don't know!

Happy note: We tried food for the first time, well we had tried rice and oatmeal before, which she wanted nothing to do with, so we were thinking that if we give her food then maybe it will stay in her. So Kenzie got her first taste of carrots and she LOVED them! It took her a little bit to get use to the spoon-she kept wanting to put her tongue on top of the spoon! But she did good, so we have one more day of carrots then we are moving on to the sweet potatoes...maybe she won't be as picky of an eater as I am!

Have a wonderful Monday everyone, and a very HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!! I will try and post pictures later, maybe after we get some more taken from Thanksgiving in North Carolina-if we ever make it!

How time flies...

I can't believe that tomorrow by baby will be 4 months old! I am writing about this today because I know that I will not have time to do so tomorrow because of our hectic schedule for the next couple of days...actually our schedule has been crazy all week...here's a little run down:

Monday- after thinking about it for awhile I decide that I should call the pediatrician to see what I can do about her projectile vomit/spit up until our appointment on thursday-the nurse calls back within and hour of my call and says that they need to see her TODAY. So blessing number 1-I am thankful for a job that is understanding and allows me to leave a little early. So after being extremely busy at work all day (b/c my other counselor was out sick) I leave and hurry to the daycare, to which they tell me that she had spit up so much that she was puking clear liquid. Now I am glad that I called and I rush to the peds office and wouldn't you know I hit every stinking RED LIGHT there was!!!! In the process of waiting to see the doctor, she throws up twice. LOVELY and because I was in a rush, there was not an extra set of clothes in her bag ( I am a horrible mother). The doctor sees her and says, "switch the formula, here's a prescription for Zantac and if there is not a decrease by Thursday we will order an upper GI test on her." However, he was nice enough to give us six cans of the new soy formula for her. Kenzie screams most of the car ride home, that is until I realize what time it is and pull over to feed her and decided that I was hungry too so I pulled into the quiznos parking lot and got dinner and fed Kenzie. I drop off her prescriptions and then call clint and ask him if he would pick them up so that I can just get her home. Thank God for such a wonderful husband, he does that but thanks to traffic I am at home with a baby who is screaming her head off and no matter what you do she doesn't stop. Finally, he's home we give her the meds (which she doesn't like), a bottle with the new formula (which she does eat without a problem) and by 9 she is asleep. I fall into bed myself, only to wake up a few hours later to Kenzie spiting up in her sleep! She is unphased by all of this, meanwhile I am trying not to have a mini-meltdown! I clean her up and she falls right back asleep. End day 1

Tuesday- I drop her off at daycare around 6:10 am, and explain all of the new stuff and the teacher and myself are both hoping that this will help her situation. Then it's off to a meeting filled day, and the rain is killing me because all I want to do is SLEEP! I get my hair cut after work and pick up Kenzie, and get the news that today wasn't that much better :( She had to be changed a few times and she was extremely irritable and almost to the point of being inconsolable. So I take her home and within a few minutes of being home she vomits again and gets her daddy. *sigh* He tells me not to freak out but inside I am crying, and Kenzie begins her scream fest...and I am fighting back the tears because I just want my baby to feel better! We decided to give her a bath a little earlier than normal just because the fussiness was to the point that Clinton and I could barely hear ourselves talk. It calms her down for a while...but then she is right back to fussing. She gets her bottle, falls asleep for a bit...wakes up in time to watch 'Glee' (one of the greatest shows ever), then after a while she isn't ready for bed but ti's time to eat again, so I feed her and we fall asleep in the bed. I wake up when she begins choking (she is sitting up sleeping, another suggestion by the ped) but she falls right back to sleep. I move her to the bassinet and she sleeps til about 4, and I get up and hold her until my alarm goes off at 4:30 and by then she's asleep again so I let her lay on our bed while I get ready.

Wednesday- She has only spit up a little bit after her morning bottle before daycare. I drop her off, and I don't know why but it's getting harder for me to leave her, but that's another blog. And after work my goal is to work out, unless they call me and tell me she's had another bad day and I just pray that tonight is better.

Thursday- Daycare, work, and then will be picking her up early for her 4 month wellness check up-where she will be getting 3 if not 4 shots! So I will probably have a fussy baby again.

Friday-Clinton and I are off because guess what...I'm having my wisdom teeth extracted! So we will take Kenzie to daycare and then we will go have this done and I will come home and sleep and pray that Kenzie doesn't give Clinton too hard of a time.

Saturday and Sunday- Will depend on his work schedule, but I guess that if he does have to work his mom will help me with the baby. And Sunday Clinton really wants to go see Harry Potter, I just hope the baby and my mouth will let me do so!

*sigh*....I really love my daughter...and I know that this is not her fault, I just really want her to feel better and not have to do the upper GI, although while I have seen a decrease, the screaming has increased. And I feel horrible that I am having this done because I feel like I am dumping the baby on Clinton and his family, although they don't mind my mommie instincts are making me feel bad for doing this now of all times. *sigh* (today seems to be one of those days where I am going to be sighing a lot)I am hoping though that I can take her 4 month pictures tomorrow without any trouble, but she's not always the happiest camper as of late... so we will see. Sorry that this one is so long, and just keep praying that they will figure out what is going on with her and that she can have a better night.